Still haven't found me losers!!!

http://www.joshuastevens.net/visualization/squatch-watch-92-years-of-bigfoot-sightings-in-us-and-canada/

Dirty Nasty Sasquatch Sex!!!

Gotcha!  The life of a sasquatch is actually quite lonely and not the stuff of harlequin novels.  Sure, sometimes I come across an amorous bear or cheeky moose but it is not as often as you might think.

How about that footage from British Columbia last week?  Yeah, that was my cousin Obediah. Thought he could get out for a quick jog in the hills and bam! Captured on film by some punk ass hiker.  Oh, well... it will never stick. Too far away.  Could be a dude w/ a hairy back for all you know!!!

Whoops...

Well

I am doing my best to discredit this news through various online media outlets but the moral of the story is clear... don't take a dump on some body's doorstep because they just might take your DNA!

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/02/14/bigfoot-dna-results-final_n_2681135.html